I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
