i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize