your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
