question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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