lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
its not stalking. its research.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
