i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
