I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
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