Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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