where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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