finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
