I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize