the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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