It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Randomize
