She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
