SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize