dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Randomize
