At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
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