She went from zero to smokin in five shots
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
