Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
