Nicole vs. Life
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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