Grow some girl-balls and come out already
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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