ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
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