guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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