I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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