But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
