We named our party play list daddy issues
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
