Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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