doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize