I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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