doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
