I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
