drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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