You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Randomize
