We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
