i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
she peed on how many people?
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
