I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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