taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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