Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
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