Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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