but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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