I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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