so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
