I'm going to jail i love you
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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