But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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