Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
