just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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