none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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