everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
