You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
