i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize